Dreams
Assalamualaikum
This is taken this morning at approximately 8.15 a.m. The atmosphere was a bit hazy. This is the path I take to school everyday. In view is the Science Library building. The yellow leaves were gorgeous.
In solid class this morning, I further designed my wedding dress. Haha. Tapi sebab dah bosan sketching, saya install Agile Messenger on my touchie and weee~ I now got to chat during class on YM. Pffftt~
Masa tengah tunggu chemistry class start and I was fumbling with touchie, Poh asked me, "What do you want to do after you graduate?"
I said, "I don't know. Later lah I think. Still so long what." Ignore the broken english."Not that long. Only a year left."
"A year IS long," I said. "You can change your mind like ten times in a year." Well, maybe more.
"What's your dream? What do you want to do in your life?"
Again I answered, "I don't know."
I wasn't trying to look cool by sounding ignorant about my future. The truth is I honestly don't know what to do next. All my life, I had other people mapping things out for me. I went with the flow. Instead of thinking what I like and what I want, I ended up choosing the path a lot of others take. And I learn to love it. And so I don't really know what do I do next. People expected a lot from me. I expected a lot from myself. I hope to contribute to the people.
But as I sat down, pondering over Poh's question, maybe, just maybe, my life isn't just about being big and fulfilling expectations. Maybe being happy is just enough. Maybe I spent too much time having sky-high dreams, I need to come back down to earth.
And as I read the question on the surveys we have to fill after chemistry class, asking, "What do you want to do after graduation?" I feel like tearing the paper apart. Didn't I just say I don't know?
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